Wednesday, January 25, 2012


Last night was a family holiday of sorts.  You see, I am a political junkie.  Which side of the aisle, I will allow you to draw your own conclusions (as I decided when I started this blog to not get political).  However, I never, ever miss a State of the Union address.  Ever.  Agree or disagree with the current administration, this is our nation and it is an important speech.  And I love all the posturing.  The refusal to applaud.  The sideways glances.  The pregame and post game analysis by the experts.  I simply adore it. 

When I got married to my husband, I not only gained a wonderful spouse, but a stepdaughter who adored the SOTU as much as I did.  (well, so does my husband, but he doesn't appreciate the speech in the same manner as my stepdaughter and I'll see)  I discovered this the very first time we watched together and she was shouting at the television similar things that I was thinking.  And a family tradition was born.  At the time, she was 14.  Now it is nine years later.  She is married and living 600 miles away.  Technology is awesome.  We have a transcript of last night.  Here is some of what transpired...

(just so I don't confuse you...I color coded our transcript with me in the black and her in the times)

Jill's eggplant it.
She is sitting with Mark Kelly.  In an equally handsome eggplant tie.
Love. Her. (we are talking about Gabby)
And her husband looks so cute when he looks at her...
Michelle looks awesome! Love the bling:)
She is so way better looking than Calista Gingrich. Calista looks like a snowy owl.
With bad botox.
Hahahaha. Snowy Owl.

Grrrrr...Jack is out of bed upstairs and I don't want to get off my butt to go yell at him.  So he gets to roam free for now. #SOTUGetOutOfJailFreeCard
If the GOP gets up without Boehner's permission he will laser them with his jaundiced eyes.
He is such a petulant child.
Petulant. Yes he is.
Oh you meant Jack!
No I meant Boehner!
Jack is an angel!

That's the worst being right there with the camera on all the time.
What if you had a poky booger?
Or an inner ear itch?
I think Biden does have fleas
Or between the boob itch?
Or dandruff?
Or what if you sneezed really loud?
Or farted.
Or if the guy next to you had a silent but deadly.
Hahaha...butt noises at SOTU
Or if POTUS had a butt noise!

And saving the best for last...which doesn't have anything to do with SOTU, but me not being able to control auto-correct...

Side note: auto correct on iPad now acknowledges my fowl language.  Even Fixes it when I misspell it.
Thank you Steve Jobs.
Damn. Foul.  Grrrrrrrrrrr.
I didn't mean BIRD language!!!!!
Cluck cluck.
Fowl language!!!

There's more...something about Obamatron, a cattle prod, and a midget, but it doesn't really make sense unless you read it alongside the SOTU.  Basically, we should be hired by CNN to live tweet the entire speech.  It would be like Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin on New Year's Eve, only much funnier.  And censored. 

Tomorrow, back to regular programming readers.  I promise no politickin, no language, and no multi-colored posts.  And no FOWL words!