I had a lovely post all ready to go yesterday. Thought it had gone live in the evening. Sometimes technology gets the best of all of us, right? To make matters worse, the darn thing didn't even save.
Grrrrrr.
So here is yesterday's post for you...an update of sorts.
I've taken the next step forward to wellness in my battle with mean anxiety. On Wednesday I had my appointment with my nurse midwife (who is amazing and perfect). She listened. She asked questions. Like any health care practitioner worth her salt, she did an assessment. She asked for my opinions too. We laughed some, we were serious some, and mostly it felt like a good chat between friends. I cannot tell you how wonderful it is to have health care providers who you feel a kinship with. The very best thing she did for me on Wednesday was at the end of the appointment. She looked me right in the eyes and said that things were going to get better. Not go back to "normal" (because what is "normal" anyhow). Nope. They're going to get better.
I left with a plan. I love plans. Plans and lists. I have a follow-up appointment in April. If anything goes horrifically off track between now and then I am to call at any time. And she told me I am normal. Like many other women she treats. That this can be treated. At some point during the appointment she picked up the giant weight off my shoulders and deposited it elsewhere.
If you are struggling with any type of mental health issue, please don't do so silently. As a mental health professional (and as someone who is going through some of her own) I cannot stress enough that these are treatable and you can get better. I will be better. Better for me. Better for my family. For my friends. For every day I have faced with unbearable anxiety and stress.
notes from the middle
